Corinne Coaching Training Day 3

Corinne Martin PC Session 3

Q1. What is front of mind as you enter today?
Q2. What are your objectives; What would you like to get out of today?
Q3. What Questions, thoughts and concerns do you have?

Example answers to questions:
1+2 Growing in our listening skills; Questioning and learning to bring the conversation to a deeper level.
1- To look at life track to see the alignment of values and lifestyle and to take a look back at our history of jobs and family background to see how they affect us moving forward today.
1-Want to have transparent relationships and be trustful in business arena
2- Listening to answer questions before moving onto the next question
2-Starting the coaching- how to get to what’s most important
2- Internal/ External processing are different- how to approach them with goals
3- Short definition of what coaching is when approaching people to practice with.
3- Do you need to get permission from the person before asking coaching questions (because they can be challenging or seen as intrusive)?

Stay away from saying ‘being coached.” It’s not a hierarchical thing. We “enter into a coaching relationship.”

NLP (means? ) Notice the type of phrases people use. “Whatever”, negatives, “I must”, command sentences, etc. Notice it because it tells you something about the person. Don’t address it directly but consider it. Ex “that’s not done” , “because it’s my boss I couldn’t tell him.”

Q. How do you respond?
Q. How would you like to respond? (this empowers them)
Q. What would be an admirable response to that situation?

Be soft on the person and hard on the issues.
Q. What does this tell you about you?

Coaching is addressing issues while being truthful to your own heart.
Our own core values come into play when coaching. Q. What won’t we coach someone into?
“My belief is that it would be much better for you if…”
Offering resources after the coaching session can be ok, helpful.

Be in a place where you draw out. (as opposed to input)
Think back to your parent’s advice and name:
1) A piece of advice you didn’t follow.
Why didn’t you follow it?
What was the value for you of not following?
2) A piece of advice you did follow.
Why did you follow it?
What was the value?
If advice aligns with what is already inside of a person they will be more likely to follow it.
Focus on the value, then lead into action.
Have discussions with children and subordinates before you make a decision. Get buy in.
The way you parent will likely be the way your children lead.
Let the questions build up before you give advice or answers. (buy in, ownership)



What are your best memories?

Challenges in past?

What would you rearrange?

Coachee, make notes of how you feel. What are your motivations? What’s gone? What’s still there?

Q. What would be important for us to talk about in this session?
Q. What’s on your heart, on your mind today?
Q. What would be valuable to talk about today?
Q. What’s important about this?
Q. How do you process?
Q. How have you grown in this area in the past?
Q. What was the process?

What is announced as the issue, often times is not the real issue. It is ok to spend time on the deeper issue but ask them if this is what they want to spend their time on- get their buy in.

You don’t always need an action plan to leave with. Some people grow in action, they need the points. Some people need to keep thinking about the questions and sort things out on their own later (journal, pray).
It is ok to leave them with questions.

Keep our eyes open to the issues. Our issues don’t just come up once and then leave. If it did it wouldn’t be a problem. But it happens in patterns. Each time we are given the opportunity to grow a little bit. We can gain new awareness and get more clarity in the midst of a situation.
Q. Why do I feel this way?
Q. What lies am I believing?
Q. Why does this affect you?
Q. What does this say about me?
Q. What does this show about my values?
Q. What’s really important in this situation?
Q. What insecurities does this situation expose?
Q. How can you grow in this situation?

Triggers and Inhibiters
Triggers are what we want to gain. (Move toward)
Inhibiters are what we want to avoid. (Move away from)
You can’t stop doing something until you’ve replaced it with something more effective.
Q. What are you getting out of it?
Q. How can you replace that?

Q. What does success look like for you? What are the benefits and drawbacks of being successful?
Q. How does God see you?
Q. How do other people see you in this area?
Q. What advice would you give yourself?
Q. Would you take that advice? Why or why not?
Q. How does that affect your view of the world?
Q. What emotions does this bring up in you?
Q. What’s your motivation in doing this?


Levels of Listening:
1. Not listening
2. Pretending
3. Selective listening
-----------------------^Attention is on ourselves---^
4. Attentive- We listen for facts figures, info, and to understand
5. Empathetic listening (moving the attention to the heart)

Will- Elements in
Motivations and desires
Values
Commitments
Habits

What are healthy motivations? Unhealthy? (pride, greed, lust, anger, guilt)